I saw 10,000 BC. Now I want to cry.
I’ve recently learn to just STFU and watch movies understanding that they can’t be historically accurate and that they are meant to just be entertaining. But this one was SO incredibly bad, that I couldn’t help but go “omg, that’s just ridic” because it was.
Our first animal - the saber-toothed cat that appeared in the movie… sigh. This animal, the smilodon, lived entirely in the Americas - 10 000 take places in the Old World. Granted, there were other animals such as the homotherium that lived in the Old and New world. But the size? And the timing? The homotherium would have died out about 20 000 years before the time of the movie and would have been half that size of that which appeared next to the humans.
The “terror birds” lived 40 million years ago… an early bird that couldn’t fly, and just stocked around preying on animals all day. It wouldn’t have been in the Old World. And lets not forget the woolly mammoth… this is the only animal in the movie that would have been alive at the correct time - but in like… the Arctic, and much smaller.
The woolly mammoth is often depicted as being substantially larger than it actually was, this movie isn’t the only one that does it. Even in cartoons, or other movies the mammoth looks larger than modern day elephants - but really it would have been about 10 feet at the base of the neck… but then they had big heads… with big tusks attached, so people assume that they were larger than they were but its an optical illusion of sorts. You know what I’m sayin’ yo?
Anyway - I started watching it thinking “I don’t even care about historical accuracy” but there was nothing else to catch my attention. It took all cliches and SHOVED it all into one movie. There was no action, there were no dinosaurs, there was no love, there was no epic ending or heroic tale. …Sigh. It was hard to look past the fluent english, nicely done eyebrows and perfectly polished teeth too…
There was potential, but it fell flat. Real flat. …I hate watching bad movies, I just feels like wasted life. I will admit that the boy was quite nice to look at.
